Meet the Parent

Introductions are odd. After seeing my mothers face when I made light of an awkward situation, I think that in future I might be more mindful of others feelings... or perhaps will continue to exploit them for my own merriment. The jury's still out really. 

I brought MrIkea home to meet the family. Julie Baby had been psyching herself up for a good fortnight, and her carefully planned casual greeting did little to fool me. She hugged me hello, asked how I was, then introduced herself to MrIkea and went straight in for the hug and kiss hello.

“Mum, this isn't him”.

Thinking she might be more used to my behaviour after close to two decades, I didn't think she'd react in quite the way she did. Visible recoiling from the hug, hands in close to her chest and an 'Oh dear”, I was laughing so hard I could hardly even tell her I was kidding. Obviously it was him, I don't bring home that many fellows to meet the crew. With that part out of the way, she was quick to pull out the freshly baked muffins from the oven and offer various beverages. I don't get this kind of reception when I visit home unattached – if I had known such attention was to be lavished I would have started dating a long time ago I'm sure.

The cliched move of showing off the baby photos happened ten minutes into the visit as I left for a bathroom break. Thankfully no photo albums were in sight, but the refrigerator's photo magnet of Toddler Megan on the Tricycle was rapidly pointed out. I was scared to think of what would be said if my absence exceeded two minutes. Brother James was itching to 'stumble upon' the video from early high school which had footage of yours truly imitating various teachers in various performances. Not on a stage or for any reason other than classroom entertainment, just because that's the kind of kid I was...

Julie Baby found a few opportunities for me to hiss at her, such as asking if MrIkea had yet heard my impersonation of various Chris Lilley characters (hello, Jonah Takaluah), and took it upon herself to describe the more creative attributes of the brothers. “Tom's always loved the beach and swimming, James has always been into his music and his singing, and Ben's the bike rider in the family, he loves his BMX”.

Upon asking “what's Megan's 'thing'?”, Julie Baby's reply was “er, laughing”.

It's true. I generally find everything to be a right riot.

Keep on dancing.